Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: Welcome to Rise up at work. I'm Dr. Deepak Bhutra, and today we are unlocking the work life you were meant to live. You're watching now Media Television.
Welcome to Rise up at Work. I'm your host, Dr. Deepak Bhutra. This is where we get practical about performance. How people lead, decide, and stay steady when the pressure is real.
This episode is resilience architecture and I'm very excited to have us. Joining us, Jason Safford. He is creator of Win youn Day. It is a absolutely brilliant book. Nice and hefty as well. Doesn't blow in the wind, but it's got a lot of stuff in it that's not windy. It's actually pretty cool. Jason, welcome. I want to start with something that you spoke about, but before I get into it, tell me in a minute or so, Jason, what problem do you solve and why this book resonates? And who are you, sir?
[00:00:49] Speaker B: Thank you, Deepak. I am so grateful to have the honor to be on your show.
To answer your question, my name is Jason Safford. I'm the author of Win youn Day and I focus on helping people with resilience.
So the problem that I often solve is when people are in crisis, when everything is collapsing or breaking down, who do they call?
Where do they turn?
I am that person. I am branded as a resilience architect for a reason. I use crisis to help design your reinvention and your transformation.
You know, Jason, answer everything.
[00:01:34] Speaker A: You did, in fact, answered it so much that I'm weighed down with the possibilities of this conversation. Jason, let's take a second here. So I got my audience listening in and someone's thinking, looking at his friend and saying, oh, no, no. Is this one of those wishy washy things? I don't know what this resilience thing is. I'm 21 years old. Give me a can of Diet Coke and give me two cigarettes and I can do anything, Right? Jason, question for you. When I flipped your book open, right? And when I was intrigued, how does one make a living on this constant resilience when every person will say it's all in the head or just stand in front of a mirror and you rah, rah yourself too. Jason, there's something you said in the book that I wanted to check with you. Crisis is not the end of you, it's the beginning written in fire. And I had one of those winter is coming moments, right?
What exactly are you saying and how can we start this conversation by you shedding some Light on that.
[00:02:23] Speaker B: Yeah, that's a great question. And, and thank you for asking, Deepak, you know, to answer from the standpoint of the 21 year old who's taken a couple of, you know, Diet Cokes or whatever caffeine thrill they need in a, in a cigarette.
[00:02:39] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:02:40] Speaker B: Crisis is an architect.
And most people think that success is all about how much adrenaline you can fuel yourself with.
But the reality is, is that you're going to burn out, you're going to collapse, you're going to have that crash. Especially because with nicotine and caffeine alone, they don't last forever.
So that crash does come and crisis does come. It strips illusion, it removes titles, it exposes what was holding you together artificially like Diet Cokes and nicotine. Right, right. So for the professional under pressure, this means something simple. If it's breaking, it was never built to carry the weight of where you're going.
So think about fire and the fact that fire does not destroy steel, it refines it.
The pressure you're under is not proof of inadequacy, it's the proof of expansion.
[00:03:39] Speaker A: I just have this, you know, it's like I'm back in high school again and we're trying to understand why railway tracks have gaps in them. Right. And the answer was that in heat, things expand, things change. And you want to make sure that the, you know, the steel doesn't bend. It kind of like, you know, keeps a straight line.
And I never, I would say that those metaphors, when you connect it back the way you just. Jason is actually, I would say, very powerful. Right. Because at the end of the day, people look at this and think about this as touchy feely or, you know, woo woo stuff. And it's not because I, and I can particularly tell you finally, at the age where I am with all the gray, you actually get to understand how much actually happens in the human mind and how much we actually don't even prepare ourselves for it. So the first thing that I really liked about your book was you actually talk about a lot of self understanding, focus on yourself, understand what's going on, and then frameworks. It's like I've literally visualized what I need to be thinking about. So let's dig in a bit more over here. So I am talking to a lot of people as a coach, right. And I have an extreme passion to work with 21 to 30 year olds.
If we were to give any advice, how can someone listening right now distinguish between temporary emotional collapse and structural personal weakness and this is, I know it's a lot of words. If you could just kind of break them down and give me a fair understanding of what's going on with that.
[00:04:57] Speaker B: That's again, another great question. And you know, compliments to you, really, my admiration for the fact that you chose 21 to 30 year olds as a group. Because this is where it does matter. Emotional collapse is a surge. And you know, coming out of, you know, the teenage years into being an adult, you deal with so many emotions. But the reality is, is that structural weakness is a pattern.
So think about it this way. Emotion spikes under stress. That's human weakness repeats when discipline is absent.
Okay, so the more you do not have the discipline, the self mastery to do certain things with, with repetition, you're gonna be weak.
So ask one question. When pressure hits, do I eventually respond or do I retreat?
Retreat is something that people often do without thinking about it. Like number one, hiding under the covers. Number two, blaming the alarm clock. Number three, not showing up even when it's necessary because again, the fear of embarrassment or shame or anything that has to do with feeling that emotion is something that they'll run from because they lack the discipline.
So if you respond even slowly, you're not weak, you're in training. Weakness is not feeling overwhelmed. Weakness is refusing responsibility.
[00:06:33] Speaker A: This is really interesting.
So I mean, when I was thinking about this, right, you're actually stating truths which our hearts know but brains can't reconcile. And I think that the bridge you're doing is saying that, look, we have been told by the ancients, right, do this or don't do this. And we typically kind of blindly follow it, maybe for religious reasons or whatever, but half the time our brain is telling us, does that even make sense? And I think that's one of the reasons why, I think you have a valuable role to connect these dots for people, right?
If we were to talk about, and we spoke about engineering, right?
And you describe crisis as an engineer that clears rot and exposes weak beams. Now, when I read this weak beams, I was thinking of structural engineering again, right? Because we're talking about a lot of structural stuff here. What are the most common weak beams you see in leaders and high performers?
[00:07:25] Speaker B: That's a great question again. And as you asked the question, I actually myself was visualizing one of the stories.
So when we talk about resilience architecture, we're talking about five pillars that connect through these beams.
The first beam that's most often to fail is identity.
And that identity is tied to the outcome. If I Lose, I am less so whenever they face a collapse or a crisis, they identify as if they are the collapse. They are the crisis and they're not. And I'm here to tell everyone, you are not the crisis or the failure that you're feeling or experiencing. The second one is effort without recovery. This goes back to the adrenaline, the caffeine and cigarettes.
I can slam it down and make it happen through will and sheer determination and power. And that's the so called grit that everybody talks about.
But then the reality is that you burn out. You're completely worn out from that effort. And then the third is the unexamined ego. This is where confusing intensity with effectiveness, you know, an overconfidence that you know, young people are so natural to have because especially when you have talent or any amount of skill, you often will rely on those things rather than understand the self mastery necessary to apply and blend it together.
So pressure reveals these beams immediately.
And it's important to understand that crisis is not cruel, it's corrective.
[00:09:10] Speaker A: Crisis is not cruel, it's corrective.
[00:09:13] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:09:13] Speaker A: And I think this is. And again, it goes back to. I think, I think your point, if I can kind of capture what you're saying, is that crisis ends up being cruel when you take it personally and you bring your identity into it. And I think that's very critical in what you said. I come from a sales background and I can assure you that the point you're making is so profound. Most salespeople that actually exit the sales function do it because they've allowed their ego to get bruised at a very personal level with the nose. They've taken rejection personally, they've gone to bed saying I'm a lousy person. I could have figured this out. Why couldn't I make this customer understand my point of view? Shame on me.
And your point, I think you are saying, is that that happens, you get beaten up. But if you allow that to beat your self worth or your identity, that's when the fund of selling disintegrates. That's when you don't live to you, you die the same day. You don't live another day to come back.
I love that. Sir, I'm going to ask one more question because I really want to understand this one. Right. So coming from a sales background and an entrepreneurship background, what happens when someone misinterprets pressure as personal failure? Are there mental health challenges? Are there physical issues? What, what, how does this manifest? What have you seen?
[00:10:26] Speaker B: You know, I'm so grateful you asked this question Deepak because this is one of the most important things, and especially with young people, they put everything on success.
And when failure strikes, it is absolutely intensified by them.
So they internalize what was meant to instruct them.
And, and that's the thing, is that failure really is instruction. You know, Nelson Mandela, in my book, I write about the fact that and it's quoted that he says, I either win or I learn.
So failure is learning. It's your opportunity to see how you can get better.
Pressure becomes shame, shame becomes paralysis. Paralysis becomes decline. But pressure is neutral. It either sharpens you or it exposes what must be sharpened. And when professionals label pressure as failure, they shrink their own ceiling.
[00:11:32] Speaker A: Wow. So I'm going to dig more into that. Up next, resilience as a structure, not a slogan. Jason is going to help us break down the five pillars and how to diagnose what's actually failing. We just got an intro to it, so let's take it from there. Thank you, Jason.
[00:11:46] Speaker B: You're very welcome.
[00:11:47] Speaker A: We'll be right back with real stories, fresh insights and action steps to help you rise up at work without losing yourself. You're watching Rise up at Work on NOW Media Television. Your ambition built your success, but somewhere along the way, your ambition took over and started running you.
Hi, I'm Dr. Deepak Bhutra. I'm an executive coach, sales strategist and host of Rise up at Work. I've spent three decades inside corporate worlds. A long time I've been witness to how pressure rewrites purpose and when you lose sight of purpose, how the right mindset can help you reset and write a greater story. Rise up at Work premieres soon on NOW Media Television. Remember, it's time to move from surviving to thriving. It's time to rise up work. And we're back. I'm Dr. Deepak Bhutra and you're watching Rise up at Work on NOW Media Television. Let's keep reclaiming your career and learning how to truly rise up at work. Welcome back. Want more of what you're watching? Stay connected to this show and every NOW MEDIA TV favorite is on live, on, live or on demand, anything you like. Download the free Now Media TV app on Roku or iOS and unlock non stop bilingual programming in English and Spanish. And if you're on the move, catch the podcast version at www.nowmedia.tv. from business and news to lifestyle, culture and beyond, Now Media TV streaming around the clock. Ready whenever you are.
So welcome back to Rise up at Work. We're here with Jason Safford and now we're moving from the reframe to the structure. Because resilience isn't just toughness, it's an internal architecture. And that's one of the biggest things that really attracted to why I wanted to bring Jason onto the call was this concept of architecture and a structural approach to this.
Jason, we touched upon and introduced in segment one, the five Pillars, right? Why did you choose to define resilience across five pillars instead of treating it as a mindset alone? Wouldn't that be just easier?
[00:13:43] Speaker B: You know, it's a great question, Deepak, and I have to tell you that the, the answer is that, that resilience is architecture, because mindset collapses under exhaustion.
If the body is depleted, the mind lies. If emotion is suppressed, it erupts. If purpose is unclear, effort scatters.
So when you think of resilience being systemic, you're not a thought, you're a structure.
And the, the difference is people associated the word with how they feel rather than understanding that across five pillars, it's a design.
[00:14:31] Speaker A: And I, and I like that because I've always said to people, I come from a process engineering background. Right, Jason? And we always talk about solid structure. Solid. And we also remember we've had our own fair share of, you know, culture eats strategy for breakfast. My favorite line is actually the opposite. Both culture and strategy get eaten by structure. That's right, breakfast. You know, structure, no, discipline. You can have all the lofty ideals and understandings, but it's not going to go anywhere.
Now, let's drill on this. When people look at five Pillars, right, they assume that they are all equally weighted on that they all matter which pillar tends to collapse first under sustained professional pressure. And the reason I ask that is because, Jason, I want my audience to kind of get a feel from you what to look out for what gives first.
Help them, please.
[00:15:19] Speaker B: That's absolutely the best question you could ask, and I'm so grateful you did. Physical mastery is always the first pillar to collapse. When you think about it, whenever there's crisis, people stop eating, they stop drinking water, they stop sleeping properly, they stop moving, they're sitting down, they're going into bed, their, believe it or not, their breath gets shallower and the body whispers long before the mind screams.
[00:15:46] Speaker A: That's interesting. That's very interesting, because I remember I had to go for surgery, Jason, and the first thing the doctor said to me was that your recovery is going to be predicated on one simple thing. And I thought, he's going to tell me about this, that. And he said to me, you're breathing. And I looked at him and said to him, what are you talking about? And he actually said to me, I'm going to give you a device. I'm asking you to take this device. And I want you to take not shallow breathing that you normally do. I want you to take very deep.
I want to take it deep. I want you to hold. And I said to myself, what is he talking about? But then I actually went and did some research and it blew my mind. Jason, here we are. I have four degrees from four continents, and I find out very late in the game that breathing is so critical to us. We talk about everything else. Right. What colors make you pop on tv. Deepak. But no one actually tells you that, you know, breathing in deep, it actually going to help you stabilize. It does a lot. So this is very powerful. And I highly recommend people to dig into this bit more because I think in your book you do cover a lot about the physical elements, which I thought was very interesting because, and you're right, for me personally, it's my blood sugar. It's between meals, I feel something different. And I think it depends upon age also. Right? Jason? Some things happen at a certain age. Some things don't happen at a certain age.
Now, Jason, we spoke about the physical element. That's the first one to come up. Can you help me understand the emotional side of things? How does emotional strain show up physically before someone even realizes it?
[00:17:05] Speaker B: Yeah, that's. Again, I'm so glad you're asking these particular questions because they're, they're linked and they're so aligned.
So tension is something that appears physically through little movements like a tight jaw when you're, when you're gritting your teeth, locked shoulders, short breath, going back to breath. Is that, you know, tension? And, and to that point, when you breathe deep, you actually lower your heart rate.
And that's one of the things about it. So again, digestive disruption. You know, when you, when you suddenly feel that gr. You know, that grip in your stomach, that's often tension, that's emotional strain. And then, you know, believe it or not, muscle twitches, things that you feel in different parts of your body that are unusual.
Funny enough, a lot of people feel pain in their joints.
You know, that's a huge sign of the emotional strain.
[00:18:06] Speaker A: And it's, it's interesting you touch upon that because I was actually going to ask you that again. If my listeners are listening right now and they're unable to pinpoint some of These things, what language would you use to show them how it manifests? And I think I just heard you saying pain in joints. Your jaw, the way your jaw. Absolutely.
My neck. In fact, I could, I would even tell you that I can feel a certain stiffness in my neck. And if I were to touch it, I could literally feel a muscle has literally hardened or stiffened because of some reaction that I'm having. So I think each person has to figure that one out. And I think that's a very good point you made there. Now, if, Jason, the five pillars, we spoke about them, right now we now a lot of us are watching our loved ones as well, right? And if I were to flip the question upon you, you just spoke about events and instances where I am being told to figure things out, right? But if I am, let's say, operating with my son, I'm sitting across from dinner with my 26 year old and my 26 year old is doing certain things, how does one identify and know that this is something to got to do with his mental state, his mental architecture, his resilience? How can I then help? What do we say at that point? And I know this is the way you wrote the book, Jason, right? Is written that you read, absorb and apply. And as a caregiver, I'm sitting here as a parent asking you when we speak to certain people, right. And you pick up and sense something, what are those things that I'm looking for, Jason? And you may not, you may think that's an odd question, but I really feel that it would help some of the people who have friends, colleagues at work who are there looking and watching sometimes you're very good at your own resilience. But how can I get better at helping people with their resilience? It's more of a teacher moment for you. So what are we looking for when we see some people going through that? What do we typically say at those moments?
[00:19:50] Speaker B: Absolutely. Another great question. And I think it's so appropriate from a caregiving perspective, if you think about it from almost a meditative perspective, if you're able to close your eyes and ask five questions.
The first question is, what is my thinking? Is it clear that deals with your mental, okay, am I reactive or responsive? That lets you evaluate your emotional state at that moment, then you can get into your work. Does your work feel meaningful?
That addresses your spiritual Is my body energized or drained? You all of a sudden can analyze your physical state and then finally, am I adaptive or rigid? And you address your creative mindset so where the answer weakens, that pillar is the one to address with reinforcement.
[00:20:49] Speaker A: So if I am seeing and I'm observing a jaw tightening in someone that I care about sitting across from me, these five approaches or things that you put is not just self, self reflection, it's potentially also helping the other person to kind of, what are you feeling in the moment? Are you, what do you, what. I think this is very powerful. I understand that. So now I have a question for you. Looking at the five pillars, right? And if you were to pick on each pillar, what is one daily discipline that you would recommend? Jason, One could adapt to strengthen not just that one pillar, but potentially get the synergistic effect that allows all five to become six or seven impacts. I don't know. Just a question.
[00:21:28] Speaker B: Is it to. Excellent question. And again, I'm grateful because this goes to what the when your day methodology really is.
So morning stillness is really the number one discipline that strengthens multiple pillars. When you get up in the morning and you, you're just able to be still with yourself and then from there, movement.
So go from stillness, where you just allow the energy around you, allow the, the lack of noise, the lack of distraction to just reset you and then go into movement. Five minutes of intentional breathing, 10 minutes of physical activation.
This stabilizes emotion, it clears thought, it strengthens body, and it anchors presence. And so now you have installed resilience before the day attacks.
[00:22:27] Speaker A: And if I have installed resilience before the day attacks, then I'm assuming also that there is a compound benefit to my recovery as well, which would be faster and the way I react. So it's like headless chicken. And maybe this time I'm just a chicken, but I'm not headless anymore. So I couldn't think of a better metaphor. So, Jason, so let's say for one second that I have understood your point of view and I'm aligned with you. But Jason, if someone feels overwhelmed in that moment and cannot identify why and what's going on here, what would you tell them is a way to diagnose which pillar is under stress?
[00:23:02] Speaker B: You know, that's again, such a great question because it goes back to the five questions that I, you know, mentioned before. Yeah, but it's being able to sit down with yourself. And so to your, to your point, if in the beginning of the day you install resilience, right. The day is going to stretch you in different ways. Okay. So crisis is going to come up. Life has a way of presenting you with things you didn't expect so no matter how you plan your day, life is always going to change, whatever that plan is. And so you're going to be stretched. And that resilience allows you to be flexible and then to be able to recover.
So when you reset yourself at the end of the day, you can literally sit down with yourself in that silence again. And one of the things I always say is just say to yourself, I release all attachments, control and fear at the end of the day and let it go.
[00:24:03] Speaker A: Because it's not necessarily in your control. It's I'm with you, you allow it to control you. Jason, we're going to move on to the next segment. Thank you for that, sir.
Coming up next, effort alone is not the answer. We're going to talk about completion, recovery, awareness and how to win the day after a hard loss.
Coming right up. We'll be right back with real stories, fresh insights and action steps to help you rise up at work without losing yourself. You're watching Rise up at Work on NOW Media Television. Your ambition built your success, but somewhere along the way, your ambition took over and started from running you. Hi, I'm Dr. Deepak Bhutra. I'm an executive coach, sales strategist and host of Rise up at Work. I've spent three decades inside corporate walls a long time. I've been witness to how pressure rewrites purpose and when you lose sight of purpose, how the right mindset can help you reset and write a greater story. Rise up at Work premieres soon on NOW Media Television.
Remember, it's time to move from surviving to thriving. It's time to rise up at work. And we're back. I'm Dr. Deepak Bhutra and you're watching Rise Up At Work on NOW Media Television. Let's keep reclaiming your career and learning how to truly rise up at work. Welcome back.
If resilience is a structure and that's what we kind of understood along the way, then we're going to talk about discipline because discipline is how you operate inside it, especially when you don't feel like it, which many of us don't. Right.
And Jason has made a very strong point. Most professionals are going to look at effort and over index on it and then wonder why they are still burnt out. And I think this is a very important discussion we're going to have. Right, Jason, this segment is going to talk about how to convert resilience into repeatable operating system.
You talk about effort, completion, recovery and awareness. Right. And these are all big words and may go over the head of my listeners. Let's break it down.
You talk about the fact that most professionals over index on effort, but I thought we should be focusing on effort. Right, but you are saying effort alone is not sufficient. What am I missing here?
[00:26:07] Speaker B: It's a great question, Deepak. And the fun of it is that going back to the first segment where you Talked about the 21 year old with caffeine and cigarettes, their, they're just driving forward, they're, they're full of gumption, they're full of aggressive. You know, they're going to make it happen and that's the effort.
The, the energy is going in one direction and they're not looking ahead at what's going to happen when they hit that wall.
So because effort without completion leaks power, you have to look at it from the standpoint that effort starts completion. Compounds and unfinished tasks drain the mental bandwidth and self trust.
And one of the things we talked about in section two or segment two was the fact that failure is not losing, failure is learning.
So when you bring it together, and I'm going to really put this in the best way I know how, Vince Lombardi once said, winning isn't everything, it's the only thing.
And so when you think about it from the standpoint of winning as a formula for success.
[00:27:29] Speaker A: For success, yes.
[00:27:30] Speaker B: It's more than effort, it's the whole thing together. Because you're not going to win every battle, but you can win every day.
[00:27:42] Speaker A: And which brings us back to the title of the book, win your day. And in your case it's win every day. Got it, boss. In fact, it's winning every moment, right? Because it's a series of moments which leads to a day in any case. So, so that was actually very interesting. Take Jason, because as you were talking, right. I actually realized a lot of people, I would call it busyness is a great moniker. Right guys, I was on emails for six hours today and my ex boss used to ask me a very simple question.
How much of that six hours was actually on emails that mattered?
And when you were focused on that, what about the rest, which was noise? So you were celebrating six hours, but of that, what really helped you move the needle was only two hours worth of work.
What are you going to do now to get that focus back in? And that was a very profound moment for me to actually understand.
Sir, I'm going to move on. What is the difference? And we're going to dig into this effort thing because I'm really intrigued by this. Right, what is the difference between effort and completion in real world performance. Because at the end of the day, you said something about outcomes matter, but you also raised it to a different level, right? You said, what is the big picture involved here? So let's dig into this. What is the difference between effort and completion in real world performance? How would you respond to that, sir?
[00:28:57] Speaker B: Yeah, that's another great question. Because again, as we said, effort starts. So think about it in terms of like Newton's laws of motion, Effort is what helps you overcome inertia. It begins the motion, okay?
But you're going in a path where completion is what builds the identity, the goal, who you are intending to become.
So when you think about it and, and another one of these, you know, great quotes is from Yoda. If you're a Star wars fan at all, there is no try.
There is either do or do not.
[00:29:41] Speaker A: Do not.
[00:29:41] Speaker B: So anyone can try, right? Professionals finish.
And that's really what it's about, is understanding that it's one thing to show, show up and make an effort for a day or a week or a month.
It's another thing to become that identity where you show up year after year, you are a finisher, you're going to close the deals even on your worst day, because you understand it's the discipline of the routine and the habit to keep doing the same thing.
[00:30:17] Speaker A: You know, you spoke about Yoda and I don't know, I think this is from Arthur Conan Doyle and Sherlock Holmes or something like that, right? To be or not to be. Oh, no, that's Shakespeare, right? To be or not to be. That's the question, right? So there you are.
[00:30:30] Speaker B: That's right.
[00:30:30] Speaker A: So to me, these were words which sound cool, but as I listen to you, I actually start understanding how this metaphor start connecting together. It's very powerful. Right? So I have a question for you.
As a 21 year old, I have neglected myself a lot, right? I used to think that, hey, recovery is what I have a couple of beers, go to bed, wake up with a headache. But I did sleep for a few hours. Isn't that cool? And back to work again.
What is going on with these future leaders who are now 21, right? Let's talk with them as future leaders.
They neglect recovery.
I have a question for you.
They think that it's going to give them this competitive advantage, but I'm questioning this.
The what recovery do you think is necessary? And how do you use recovery as a strategic advantage?
[00:31:19] Speaker B: Yeah, that's again, such a great question. And I'm always, you know, you you ask such great questions that I'm grateful for because the, the reality for a
[00:31:30] Speaker A: 21, I stole them from here. I don't know whose book this is. It looks like you, Jason. Is that your younger brother?
[00:31:36] Speaker B: But yeah, it's a good looking guy. Better looking than me.
[00:31:40] Speaker A: And, and just, just a quick digression. Right. The reason why I kind of read this book and I just, I don't know if it's going to come out clean or not, is that the book is actually written in a very, I would say LinkedIn vibey TLDR. I know you don't like to read pros, so guess what? I'm going to spoon food you nuggets. I'm going to give you a line. You're going to get some tips from me. I'm not going to make it difficult for you. And the stories, you actually have stories in here that connect the dots. Oprah Winfrey, Nelson Mandela, you just spoke about and so on, so on. So I. And that's one of the reasons why I wanted you on this show, Jason, because I felt for a 21 to 30 year old who complains about the fact that he can't read more than X number of characters or he wants to get something snappy in his feed, this is a good compendium. It's a good way to slowly absorb some stuff. Don't be, you know, nervous about the 500 pages, which I must admit, I was. Jason. 520 pages. Sir, you have outdone yourself.
[00:32:39] Speaker B: So I'm so grateful for you. Thank you.
[00:32:41] Speaker A: So now back to you. My apologies. Right, so.
[00:32:45] Speaker B: No problem.
[00:32:46] Speaker A: So I'm, I'm a sales coach. Right. And I'm a question I really, I need to ask you is that if I'm in sales and I've lost a significant deal, how would a salesperson apply your winning formula in real time to get out of it?
[00:33:00] Speaker B: Yeah. So I'm gonna blend the last question, which I didn't really get to answer with this one because.
[00:33:06] Speaker A: Yes, yes, blended, sir. Because I got hyper excited. My apologies.
[00:33:09] Speaker B: Yeah, they both go to the understanding of what recovery really is.
And most people look at recovery, to your point as turning on the TV and vegging out, drinking a few beers, hanging out with their friends, socializing. They look at that as recovery. And the real recovery feels like weakness.
Real recovery is sitting alone with yourself.
Real recovery is taking time to reset, to understand that you've just put your body and your mind through trauma of the day.
And so when we look at how recovery distorts judgments, fatigue narrows options, emotion intensifies, risk assessment weakens.
These are all things that when you're making decisions, especially strategic decisions, being able to recover is most important. And, and I want to share with you that Ray Dalio, who's the world's. Well, he, he just sold his company, but he's still considered the world's largest fund manager, meditates for no less than 60 minutes a day and always before he needs to make any crucial decision.
So let that sink in, that the world's greatest financial manager focuses on his recovery first before he makes any critical decision.
And in terms of sales loss, think about it in terms of reviewing objectively within 24 hours of what you've done.
Extract one lesson and document it.
Move the body, reset the state and then identify what was controllable and then make the next call.
[00:35:08] Speaker A: Again, I'm breathing deeply.
I enjoyed that. Jason, there's a lot, again, that happened over there, right. We did discuss the sales thing. We spoke about this recovery also, and I think it's very important.
Now, if we talk about someone that has misunderstood and there's a salesperson, right, if someone is burning out, which part of the formula that you've been talking about is in the book is most likely missing, what did they get wrong? So, because someone's going to take your work and someone's going to say, ah, Jason's giving me this five pillar model. I'm going to change the world. But, yeah, then they're going to realize that something ain't working because I'm still burnt out. What would that be, Jason?
[00:35:45] Speaker B: Yeah, we, we're gonna, we're gonna pound it until they get it into their head. Recovery burnout is not too much work. It's too little restoration.
And that's the reality is, you know, again, we talked about installing resilience at the beginning of the day.
So as the day challenges you and you get stretched, having the ability to recover is what's going to bring you back faster to that state of success.
[00:36:11] Speaker A: Got it. So this word recovery, right. It's got a very sportsy type of vibe to it. Right. When we talk recovery sports people typically tell me, oh, it's a resting state. But you also spoke about it's a I am in the moment with myself state. So there's a bit of both, I guess, that's happening over there. Jason, this is really cool. I'm going to start thinking about what we're going to talk about in segment four next. We're going to do execution. We're going to talk about direction over brute force.
And we're going to talk about a daily framework that people and my listeners can apply before the day ends so that you can win your day. Jason, let's get ready for segment four. I'm going to enjoy this one.
[00:36:53] Speaker B: Thank you.
[00:36:55] Speaker A: We'll be right back with real stories, fresh insights and action steps to help you rise up at work without losing yourself. You're watching Rise up at Work on NOW Media Television. Your ambition built your success, but since somewhere along the way, your ambition took over and started running you. Hi, I'm Dr. Deepak Bhutra. I'm an executive coach, sales strategist and host of Rise up at Work. I've spent three decades inside corporate worlds. A long time I've been witness to how pressure rewrites purpose. And when you lose sight of purpose, how the right mindset can help you reset and write a greater story. Rise up at Work premieres soon on NOW Media Television. Remember, it's time to move from surviving to thriving. It's time to rise up at work. And we're back. I'm Dr. Deepak Bhutra and you're watching Rise Up At Work on NOW Media Television. Let's keep reclaiming your career and learning how to truly rise up at work. Welcome back.
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Welcome back to the final segment of Rise up at Work. This is where we start landing the plane and get the wheels on place, right, and everyone goes home. But what I want to do is I want to make sure that our viewers and our listeners get actually something that they can use within five minutes, maybe that same evening. Right? Jason, you said at some point that force trains energy, direction channels it. Let's make that real in this conversation. In this segment, I actually want your help to install a practical daily rhythm that could stabilize performance, give direction over force, communication under pressure improves. And then, Jason, I really would love to touch upon your gas framework, gratitude, affirmation and structure.
So if you're ready, sir, let's get going.
Jason, I just spoke about force drains energy, direction, channels data. Now, when I read it, I like it. But then when I lean back and I think about it, I hit A blank.
Could you give me an explanation that breaks through the blank and tells me exactly what you had on mind?
[00:39:14] Speaker B: Yeah, absolutely. And. And, Deepak, again, for anybody listening, the challenge of pressure, the challenge of crisis, is the feeling that you're being overwhelmed.
And so when we look at force or forcing the issue, it looks like over talking in meetings, over negotiating instead of listening, trying to dominate instead of guide, those are all tactics that breathe.
Take a step back to your point.
[00:39:54] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:39:54] Speaker B: His force is insecurity in motion, and direction is calm authority.
So it's both something that you can feel from an emotional standpoint, but also from a spiritual one. Because if you're spiritually disciplined in terms of who you are and believing in yourself and believing your higher purpose, you're going to recognize that pressure and immediately be able to ease off the gas pedal, put a little bit more break.
[00:40:25] Speaker A: Yeah. Yep. And that's really interesting, because what surprised me in my own career, Jason, was the fact that I used to think that I was a multitasker of note. And then I actually realized one day I was never multitasking at any given moment. I was only doing one thing, But I had 20 things open in the background. And having 20 things open doesn't mean you're multitasking. And that was really powerful and profound for me to actually understand. Then I also understood that it's not that I'm bad at time management. I was lousy at prioritization. I was doing things that didn't matter. And this is why I really like this. That's what I call forceful behavior. You do things out of rote habit. If I can finish this in two minutes, let's just do it. Even though I have something more important that needs my attention, because I can do it in two minutes. So it's a misappropriation of time, resource and so on. And then you pay the price.
And that direction point you make, how we can channel it, I can relate to that.
How then can someone direct a conversation under pressure without becoming aggressive? Then how do you maintain your cool? And I think, listen. And Jason, to be honest with you, we talk about sales and selling as an. But everything you're saying fits into an interview process as well. Hey, Mr. 21 Year Old, you are interviewing for a very aggressive role. You may be going to get a 30% increase.
What are you thinking through is exactly the principles that you were talking about? And then when you don't get the job, how are you going to respond to that? Again, Mr. Safford to the rescue. So it's not just a sales discovery process. I think this is principles that apply levers apply in relationships, interviews, anything, any, any setback.
This book can help with the comeback. That's how I put it. Jason. Jason, Apologies, I'm kind of hijacking your moment, sir. How does someone direct a conversation under pressure without becoming aggressive?
[00:42:14] Speaker B: You're 100% on target. And and I want to thank you again because the subtitle of the book is the Human Blueprint for Reinvention Y and it's really about understanding that we're reinventing your state.
Your current state being, you know, overwhelmed, your current state being nervous, anxious, whatever your state is, we're looking at that frequency and we're shifting that frequency to a higher frequency.
So always look at it from the frequency of calm is how you bring everything back into focus and direction. So lower your tone, slow your speech, ask better questions. Calm presence creates psychological gravity.
And most important is people follow clarity, not volume.
So the idea that saying as much as possible to get your point across often just becomes noise in everyone's head. You get the attention, everybody looks at you and they may say, wow, this person must know a lot because they're talking so much. But when they walk away, they realize there wasn't anything there.
Versus if you speak with clarity, it could be a few words. It's not about the volume, it's not about the, you know, it's about, yeah, the clarity.
[00:43:48] Speaker A: I, I, I would not disagree with that because if I look back at my own levels of self awareness and I have had some excellent managers that would just simply put their Yoda like hands on my back and simply say pause, pause. You had the first sentence.
You carried on hello, you had me, you had them at hello, but you decided to carry on with sentence two, sentence three by sentence four.
They were now confused because they you had them. But now he's heard something and he wants to know why should he still buy from you? Because there's a doubt in his mind. He says this is even more important. Why clarity matters. Because when clarity matters, when you do clarity, when you are being very not cryptic, precise and concise in your approach and discussion, you are answering what's bothering the person's mind but not planting more seeds of doubt which can hurt you in a sales process.
That was the biggest learning for me because until then I thought that as a salesperson doing consultative selling, I need to consult. And our impression of consultation is Hana, Hana. And I think that's the power of the message you're giving And I'm saying this and I'm a bit elaborate and I'm taking this very personally because I'm pretty weak and bad at that. Jason, two is to one. I'm still working on it.
And most of the people on this call, I want you to understand Jason's point of view. It's not about changing overnight, it's about first making you aware of. And I think that awareness matters because now that I'm aware, I'm always conscious about it. Right. Jason, let's kind of make this really a banger of a session. Gas, I don't like that word, but let's talk about gratitude, affirmation and structure in the context of a high stakes business day.
Walk me through what's going on. Why did you develop this as a framework?
[00:45:31] Speaker B: Yeah, great question.
Gas is what you need to move from one place to the next.
And so if you look at it in terms of fuel, what's the best fuel you can put in your body? So when you think about eating healthy, how about eating healthy, mentally, emotionally, spiritually.
So gratitude, being able to name one stable thing before the day begins that you're thankful for. Just being able to breathe and have presence affirmation stating who you are operating as today, being able to say I move with clarity and finish what matters. And then structure could be as simple as a smart goal. But if you identify three top non negotiables for the day, you create that structure, you create that space around you that protects you in those crisis moments.
So direction replaces overwhelm.
[00:46:34] Speaker A: So I really want to talk about gratitude, right? Because a lot of people think that we force gratitude upon people.
What if you were to give an example from the book of any one of the stories, right? Which story would exemplify gratitude for you as the best personification of how someone used gratification and that really mattered and how it reflected to the world.
[00:46:54] Speaker B: That's a terrific question. Maya Angelou, which I believe is chapter eight. If I remember my, my own book,
[00:47:04] Speaker A: I will spot check you because fact checking is a big sport lately, right? But carry on, boss, carry on.
[00:47:11] Speaker B: But, but Maya Angelou, if you read that chapter and you read her story, what a powerful sense of gratitude that she had in the way she, she lived her life despite all the crisis and trauma that she was handed as a little girl and having to come up in this world and become this incredibly powerful black woman that you know, to me is just such a powerful sense of gratitude that she shares with us. So I'm grateful for know, reading the book, I know why the caged birds sing. And, and then being able to share it with people, you know, again, I'm grateful for that opportunity.
[00:47:59] Speaker A: Absolutely. Jason, as we start wrapping up, I have to force you to help me here. Now, this is a trick question. I want you to finish this sentence for our audience.
You win your day by. But you can't say you win your day by by buying my book on Amazon.com you can't say that. Okay. You win your day by.
How would you complete that sentence?
[00:48:22] Speaker B: You win your day by becoming the greatest presence that you can be in the moment.
And by going to winyday book.com
[00:48:35] Speaker A: I love it. I love it. And there you go. Perfect. So I had a great time. Jason. Jason, if people are looking for you, people want to reach out. How do you help people? What problem do you solve? And where can people find you?
[00:48:49] Speaker B: Yes. Thank you again for the opportunity to be here. Deepak, I'm grateful as always and it's just such a pleasure to be able to have these conversations with you. So you can go to the site when your daybook.com if you want to get the book. If you want to reach out to me personally, you can go to Jason Safford.com or you can go to LinkedIn Jason Safford, the resilience architect, and just message me or follow me and start a conversation. I'm always happy to speak with everyone.
The company is exceptional results now.com and we're focused on the resilience circle where by becoming a member, obviously we're here to support you, give you the tools, resources, coaching, and even the resilience retreat that you need. Resilience is not a trait. It is trained architecture. And as you build it, you direct your day one day at a time.
When your day boom.
[00:49:48] Speaker A: Jason, thank you very much.
So I'm Deepak Bhutra and we just had a lot of fun with Jason. Thanks for watching. Rise up at work. If this helped you steady your mindset under pressure, please share it with people who would love to be listening to something like this and someone who's carrying a heavy day and can get something out of these conversations. We'll see you next time. Take care. Bye. Bye.
